Although it may sometimes seem harmless, pornography does have some serious effects on us. Not only do we have traditional porn websites, but we are also able to access porn at no cost. Plus we’ve got all the suggestive images that show up on dating sites and social media. So yeah, there’s a lot of porn to look at and a lot of people are looking at it. Especially men.
For the most part, women are affected by male porn use in three primary ways.
1. The effects it has on sexual performance
Some of the side effects of heavy porn use are real-world sexual dysfunction, erectile dysfunction, delayed ejaculation, and even an inability to reach orgasm. These issues are affecting men of all ages. Put simply, research shows that as men use porn repeatedly their brains become conditioned to the novelty and hyper-intensity that porn provides. Often these men have no troubles at all when looking at pornography, it is only with a real-world partner that they struggle to reach orgasm or a point of real pleasure.
2. The effects on your relationship
Generally speaking, research tells us that a man’s porn use decreases both relationship and sexual satisfaction. A recent study looking at this issue over time found that porn use by married men almost doubles the likelihood of divorce. Knowing that your partner spends most of his/her time staring at someone else other than you while getting pleasure from it, takes a real toll on you. Like it or not, it does have an influence.
3. The effects on your self-esteem
Research has shown that women whose male partners look at porn frequently may experience a loss of self-esteem. A common complaint from women is they feel like they can’t compete with the unrealistic standards set out by porn. As a result, they feel less than and not good enough. I can personally testify that I have experienced this before. I questioned my worth and before I knew it, I thought I was not good enough.
Apart from knowing the effects, the hard part is how to overcome or fix this. Although it was not easy for me to constantly be in a war such as this one, I learnt to love myself. I learnt that despite my partner’s want or need to watch unrealistic women undress, that I was good enough. I had to make a commitment to myself and my relationship to work through this. Sometimes it works out, sometimes it doesn’t.
At the end of the day, you and your partner need to have a sit-down and discuss the effects and what it is doing to your relationship. Do not let something beautiful go down the drain. Communication can do wonders!